HEAVY WITHIN

Sunday, July 30, 2006

REALITIES


REALITIES. An exciting word. A painful word. When the real score sinks in, then it is when reality becomes pain. Accepting pain requires a degree of maturity in each one of us.

This picture is a stark reality for our family. We were all gathered together, for the first time in so many years, during Dad's hospital confinement.

As of this posting, my dad remains at Brokenshire Memorial Hospital here in Davao City. As of today, we had no choice but to transfer him to a semi-private room. The family is financially exhausted and we are all deep into loans. His current hospital bill (and still counting) already approximates the cost that of a brand-new car.

The members of the family left here in Davao held a meeting last July 29, Saturday. We had to convene to discuss the harsh reality of dad's condition: he is not getting better and his condition is slowly deteriorating.

His malfunctioning kindneys have taken its physical toll on him and he is slowly becoming skin and bones. We have observed that despite his every other day Hemodialysis sessions, his blood creatinine levels remain high and he is urine output is slowly decreasing.

His high creatinine levels, declining urine output, frequent muscle twitching or cramps, confusion & delirium are symptoms of ESRD or End Stage Renal Disease. ESRD becomes FATAL when his kidneys totally shutdown - meaning zero urine output. It is then when we, the family members, must face the inevitable.

During moments of solitude, I often reflect on the series of events that have transpired with my Dad in the last seven months or so. During his initial confinement, I made a silent promise to myself that I wont give up on him, that I wont let go of him, that I would do whatever I could for him. I even asked him to be there when his eldest grandson goes to the altar for marriage.

I realize now that I am SELFISH. All of us are living on borrowed time here on earth. If it is God's Will that He takes back what He has loaned to us then there is nothing we can do about it. Advanced Medical Science & Technology can only so much delay the onset but in the final analysis, it all goes back to Him.

In this darkest hour, I fervently ask for your Prayers and for your support, to all who may chance upon this post. Even in these desperate times, I believe that there is still goodness in the hearts of people.

God Bless Us All

8 Comments:

At 4:57 PM, Blogger Dominique said...

Gonz, so sad to hear about his worsening condition. Will keep him in my prayers. Have you considered getting a priest for the Anointing?

 
At 12:17 AM, Blogger yasuren said...

hi manong ceasar. uncle nani asked me to monitor your blog for updates concerning uncle otay. i'm going to put a link in my blog.

please do update. you have our prayers. -tatat

 
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